Because I said so......

I was driving with the kids this evening and the newness of Christmas lights still gets Miles gloriously excited. As we drove by a neighbors brightly lit nativity scene Miles yelled excitedly, "Dad look! It's God! He, he's right there in those peoples yard!" I said, being sure to emphasize that Jesus was there in the manger - and he is God, "yes, Miles, there is Jesus in the manger." This was a typical nativity scene with the Mary and Joseph and donkey and cow present. Miles was still so surprised as I responded he finished by saying "Holy Cow! They have God in their yard".

A New Euphemism

I was walking down the hallway past the open door to the bathroom when I saw Miles sitting on the toilet, with a particularly strained expression. He noticed me and said, "It's okay, Mom. I'm okay. I just need to get this sorted out."

Welcome to Miles' World

For a slightly larger view, go to the YouTube version.

Otherwise, here ya go:

Recipe for Ice Cream Blackberry Hot Dogs

I swear upon Brett's life that I am not making this up. I wrote this down verbatim as Miles was dictating the instructions to me, à la Rachael Ray, as if he were reciting it from memory and not just making it up as he goes:

• sugar
  
• salt
  
• ice cream
  
• butter
  
• milk shake
  
• Nill-aid
  
• little bit of drink
  
  You just get a spoon and just mix it really slow then put it in the freezer and wait till it begins to freeze into ice cream hot dogs.

Thursday Feature: Dear Miles

I didn't have time to post the Thursday feature last week, and my inbox was flooded with a deluge of nearly one email, demanding the return of "Dear Miles." So our question this week comes to us from Sabrina in Phoenix, Arizona, who asks:

"Why do parents make their kids go to bed at night?"

I asked our resident expert. We didn't get very far.

Miles: "I don't want to go to bed! I don't want to go to bed!"

Me: "You don't have to go to bed yet. I'm just asking. Why do I make you go to bed at night?"

Miles: "IT'S NOT BEDTIME YET!   IT'S.   NOT.    DAAAAAAARK!"

Me: "Nevermind."

A walk with Miles

Hi.. I'm Brett... I'm the dad.... I'll post randomly.....

Miles and I went on a walk recently. On our walk Miles stated that he wanted to become a giraffe someday when he grows up. He soon after made it very clear that in order for that to happen, he would have to start eating a lot more grass.

After the walk was over he said, “whew that was a good long walk – I like that walk.” He looked a bit perplexed as he felt his shirt under his armpit and said, “my shirt is a little wet under my arm here – I guess a grasshopper must have jumped up there and peed – don’t you think dad?”

I had no comment.

Christmas Gift Ideas for Macey, Based on What She Currently Enjoys Playing With

• Steak knives
• Razors
• Shoes (for licking, not wearing. Esp. flip flops, because the part where the straps connect to the sole looks like a nipple from the bottom)
• Toilet bowl brushes
• Toilet water
• Sunglasses
• Hair care products
• Tampons
• American cheese (individually wrapped)